Behaviour Modeling: how our children learn by copying our behaviour

Behaviour modeling is a psychological terms that simply means learning by copying or mimicking behavior that we are exposed to. Children learn values, attitudes, language and how to behave just by watching and listening to those around them – this includes what they see on television.

Behaviour modeling is most obvious in young children who spend many hours in play copying what they have seen their parents or other significant people in their lives doing. However, modeling is something that we even as adults continue to do to learn how we should behave in any given situation.

This type of modeling is one of the most powerful ways that our children will learn what behaviors are acceptable and expected of them as children and then later on in life as adults.

How to use Behaviour Modeling to improve
our Parenting Skills

Be your child’s role model. Act and behave in ways you want your children to. If you want them to use their manners you must remember to use yours.

Let your children participate in your daily activities. For example, let them help you clean, prepare the evening meal, do the shopping and so on. Letting your children help even at a young age will give them immense satisfaction and will act as a positive reinforcement for helping when they are older. Remember your children wanting to help are ways for them to learn how our world works. It is always a way for them to develop skills that they will need later on in life

Think about what your actions and words are teaching your children. Try to look at the examples that you are setting from their point of view. Keep in mind children (especially young ones) are unable to think in a rational manner and they are either not capable of or still not good at seeing things from another person’s perspective. They will not look at your busy life and say that’s okay my parents don’t spend time with me, they are working hard to make my life easier, to give me want they never had and so on.

Instead they will see it from a simplistic egocentric view point. That is they are too busy for me, this makes me feel bad, sad, angry or some other confidence sapping emotion.

Children listen and watch us for clues on how to behave. It is important to have a strong understanding of what you want your child to be like. A parenting guide is a great way to develop a clear understanding of what you want for your children. This way you can use this concept of modeling to instill in your kids the actions, values and beliefs that you feel are most important.

Below I have listed some things that I have found to be particularly useful to use the concept of behaviour modeling with.

• Eating healthy
• Reading
• Learning new things
• Exercising on a regular bases
• Showing affection to your partner
• Listening to what others have to say
• Admitting that you are wrong
• Being tolerant of others
• Showing kindness to strangers
• Helping others
• Be true to your word
• Making time for your family
• Laughing and enjoying life and the time you spend with your family and friends

• More Articles on Child Developmental Stages
  
• Articles on how to Communicate with your child

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